One Minute
by chakochick
Summary: Based on the TV show Scandal on ABC, when Fitz asks Olivia to take just 'one minute' to forget that he's running for President and that she's his campaign fixer, and just let them be 'them' - seemed very fitting for Kathryn and Chakotay. This starts several days after their return to Voyager after New Earth. I think it will make sense when you read it.
1. Chapter 1

Author's note: Any dialogue that seems vaguely familiar is manipulated from the TV show Scandal by Shonda Rhimes. No infringement intended. I own nothing and no profit is made. Please let me know what you think. I was going to leave this as a one shot, but more episodes are coming to mind that could fit into this context. Let me know if I'm wasting my time, or worse, wasting yours.

xoxo

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Kathryn Janeway felt sick, and had for the last three days. Ever since they'd come back from New Earth she had felt on edge and depressed, and the more she threw herself into her work the worse she felt. She knew the reason why, but she refused to give credence to it.

Chakotay.

She had been so close to experiencing something with him on the planet, so close to letting herself open up to the possibility of something more than friendship, only to have it ripped away when Tuvok's voice came crackling through the comm badge in their living space. In that instant she felt equal parts relief and loss. Relief that they could go back to the way things were; back to Voyager and all of the familiar comforts and command structure that that included. However, the look of regret in Chakotay's brown eyes when Tuvok spoke of a cure had put an ache in her chest that still resided there today. She felt that regret as well. She had experienced so much with Chakotay in the relatively short time that they had lived together on New Earth, and knowing that that was now a thing of the past, she wondered at what might have been.

She had barely slept since their return, and it was beginning to show; in her work and in her interactions with the crew, in her interactions with Chakotay.

She had barely spoken to him since they returned to Voyager, and when she did, it was strictly business. She was desperate to put the walls of protocol back into place, but with each command she gave or terse response she quipped, she felt worse and worse.

And she could see the hurt settle deeper and deeper into Chakotay's expression. His brown eyes had clouded over and whenever she made eye contact with him, she no longer saw her best friend there, and the worst part was, she knew his suffering was of her own making.

She was in engineering that afternoon working with B'Elanna and her team when the dam finally burst.

"Lieutenant Torres, I need a full diagnostic report on the warp core. Ensign Ashmore, assist the Lieutenant. I want the diagnostic complete in the next thirty minutes, including hydrofero and thorazine level fluctuations over the last six weeks." The young ensign nodded, moving to stand next to B'Elanna. "Crewman Boylan, I want you and Mr. Kim working on phaser bank modifications. If we run into the Vidiians again I want tactical operations and modifications. Go over the reports we have of their shield harmonics and come up with something to impress me."

Kathryn didn't hear the engineering doors open, nor did she see Chakotay enter the room, but B'Elanna did and she heaved a silent sigh of relief, hoping that her friend had come to take the Captain off their hands. She had been running engineering ragged in the days since her return, and B'Elanna's people were frazzled nearly to their last nerve. She knew it was similar all over the ship, but she didn't like seeing her own people mistreated, especially by the Captain.

"Crewman Dell, I want you, Jor and Mendez to head down to astrometrics. Help Celes repair the conduit cables in the hydrogen detection modules." The three scurried quickly past Chakotay, glad to have an excuse to get away from the Captain.

Janeway looked around to see if there was anyone else in need of a task. It was then that her eyes fell on Chakotay. The look on his face was unreadable, but she was in no mood for anything he had to say. Her heart fell when he came to stand directly next to her.

"Captain, may I have a word?"

"Not now, Commander. We're very busy here and there's a lot of work to be done." He glanced around him quickly, catching B'Elanna's eyes. Her desperation for him to get the Captain out of her workspace was obvious and Chakotay knew that everyone present felt the same way. The tension was extremely thick in the confines of engineering.

"I'm afraid it's quite important that I speak with you." Kathryn let out an audible huff.

She knew there was nothing going on on this ship that was pressing enough to pull her away from the task at hand...which meant that he wanted to talk to her about his feelings, or hers; their relationship or their friendship, and she couldn't go there with him right now...maybe not ever. She turned defiantly away from him. "I'm afraid it'll just have to wait." She didn't look at him as she moved to another console, punching up several diagnostics reports that should have been completed earlier in the day; her brow furrowing at the realization that they weren't complete. She didn't see Chakotay walk briskly towards her, didn't realize he was next to her until she felt his fingers clamp down around her upper arm, pulling her away from the console. Her eyes went wide as she turned her head quickly to look at his face.

Chakotay could feel her anger seething below the surface, and he knew that she would probably reprimand him for this, but they couldn't continue on as they were, and the crew couldn't continue on with their Captain behaving this way.

Come hell or high water, Chakotay was going to make this right.

B'Elanna saw him take her arm forcefully and knew that he would probably spend a night or two in the brig for it, but she was so relieved to have Janeway out of engineering that she couldn't make herself be too concerned.

Kathryn was smart enough to remain silent so as not to draw attention to herself or the fact that Chakotay was using his much stronger body to more or less drag her down the corridor towards the nearest turbo lift.

Thankfully, as of late, the entire crew of Voyager seemed to pay attention to where Captain Janeway was at all times and avoid that area at all costs if it could be arranged, so they didn't run into another soul on their short walk.

Chakotay more or less pushed Kathryn into the lift, turning away from the door as it hissed shut. "Deck Three." He called out.

Just as the lift started to move Kathryn overrode him. "Computer, halt turbo lift." Her eyes shone fiercely at him. It was not anger she felt, but fear. Fear at what was coming next, but she hoped she was able to convey the former emotion in her steely eyes. "How DARE you!"

"Kathryn, stop. Stop this now." His tone was soft and gentle and it immediately riled and relieved her. Milk and honey and comfort and she felt herself tremble as the emotions of the last few days, the last few weeks threatened to overwhelm her. She was desperate to get back those feelings she had on New Earth, but knew that in the confines of Voyager, it simply wasn't an option. The conflicting needs and wants threatened to rip her in half. Close to her breaking point at the sound of his soft voice, she couldn't meet his eyes. She knew if she did, all the work she'd put in to build her walls of protection and professionalism back up would crumble. "Kathryn, look at me."

Damn it.

Her eyes lifted from the floor, meeting his and finding, not the cloudiness of his sorrow, but the warmth of her friend. She felt tears prick her eyes but she refused to let them fall. He could still see the emotion swimming in them as his hand raised to touch her arm, but dropped again to his side before he made contact. She wasn't sure if she was relieved or regretful.

"I'm the Captain." Her voice came out wavering and she saw his features soften.

"I know." His answer was so resolute, so understanding, yet his eyes held a promise of something more. It inspired and terrified her.

"I am responsible for the lives of this crew." She was pleading for his understanding, not realizing that she already had it.

"I know that, Kathryn. No one is asking you to give that up." He took a step towards her. She took a step away, her back coming up against the wall of the turbo lift. "But can't you just, for one minute, just stand here with me?" He took another step closer, and with nowhere to retreat, she stood her ground, her eyes on his. "For just one minute, you're not the Captain and I'm not the Commanding Officer. We are just us. We don't have to go back to engineering, or talk, or think or...for just one minute." His eyes conveyed everything that his words could not. "Just stand here with me."

Kathryn had a retort ready on her lips when she realized that he needed this too, just as much as she knew in her heart that she did. Where she thought she should feel resignation and defeat, she felt triumph and hope. One minute was barely any time at all, but she could give him that...give herself that.

"One minute." To anyone else her tone would have sounded defeat. To Chakotay, he heard nothing but acceptance.

The faintest grin played on his lips as he leaned towards her, his forehead coming to rest on hers. Her eyes fell shut at the warmth of his skin against hers; the play of his breath across her lips. He put one hand on the wall next to her shoulder for balance, but made no other move to touch her.

Her hand slid up to rest on his chest next to his comm badge; her fingers an anchor keeping her grounded to what could have been, what he had offered her that night when he spoke of an angry warrior finding peace.

He created a peace in her just as much as she did in him. They were yin and yang; two equal halves of the most intricate puzzle that only they held the answer to.

She felt her breathing even out as she drew a slow breath in through her mouth, pursing her lips to let it escape just as slowly. A small smile played there that hadn't been seen in days, not perhaps, since she'd learned of the boat that Chakotay had planned to build for her. The boat that would be too small to fit her bathtub.

Though Chakotay's eyes were shut as well, he felt her smile; the change in the way her breath caressed his skin told him that she was acquiescing. He let out his own slow sigh, pressing just a fraction closer to her, his own silent seal of approval.

After another silent moment Kathryn pulled back, taking a deep breath as she opened her eyes to look at her best friend, for the first time in days, she really looked at him.

He'd done it again.

In one minute he'd taken on her burden of the last three days and made it go away...just as he promised her that night on New Earth that he always would.

She pulled her hand away and he leaned back from the wall. His dimples played on his face for the briefest of moments before he schooled his features, glad to see the glimmer back in her eyes. He knew they matched his own.

"Computer, resume turbo lift." He spoke, turning to face the door, giving Kathryn a moment to regain her own composure.

She wiped a tear from the corner of her eye before it had a chance to fall, and when the lift door opened, Chakotay exited, turning towards his own quarters. After another moment and a deep, cleansing breath, Kathryn exited towards her own.

And together, they carried on.


	2. Chapter 2

HUGE thank you to a_modern_girl for the beta and AMAZING ideas. This chapter wouldn't be a thing without you!

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Kathryn was tired.

Deep in her bones, 'I could sleep for twelve hours straight and still be tired' tired. Her muscles ached and her stomach rumbled angrily for the food that would not come. The food they had found so far was meager at best, and she would see her crew eat before she took part. She felt the start of a caffeine withdrawal headache pulsing in her temples, and she desperately wanted a bath.

But her crew needed her to be strong, and she'd be damned if she broke in front of them.

It had been easier, for everyone, in the light of day; there were tasks to accomplish and foraging for resources was easier. The air was hot and the land barren, but everyone had something to do.

But now darkness had fallen, along with the temperature, bringing the crew's spirits down with it.

Neelix, bless his heart, was doing everything he could to keep morale from plummeting. Kathryn could tell that he was making it up as he went along, but he garnered a few smiles from the exhausted crew, and for that she was grateful.

Tuvok, she had noticed earlier, had begun to make weapons. She prayed to a deity that she didn't believe in that they would have no use for them, but was comforted by them nonetheless.

The only person she hadn't seen in over an hour was Chakotay.

She had been busy, moving to and fro amongst the crew to make sure everyone was warm enough, and as comfortable as possible. Since they had gotten several small fires going, everyone seemed to be a bit happier...or at least less downtrodden. Some of the crew had formed into sleeping groups; huddling for warmth in rings around the fires. Some had elected to keep watch, or find something useful to do in aiding Tuvok or others who were still busy with their tasks.

After getting the first fire started with several of the crew member's hair, Kathryn's included, Chakotay had disappeared. At first Kathryn thought that he was going to collect more firewood, but she hadn't seen him since.

A nervous tendril began to lace itself around her heart as she moved around the outskirts of their camp again, looking at the faces of each crewmember in red, looking for Chakotay.

He was nowhere to be found.

Not wanting to go too far away from camp, but needing to know that he was safe, she began to circle wider, casting out her senses for any sign of him.

Finally, in the darkness of the night, she saw him.

He was standing alone, facing away from camp, his arms at his sides. At first she thought he was watching something, and she froze on the spot, nervous that she would spook or alert whatever he was focused on. But after a few more seconds, realizing that wasn't the case, she approached again. Watching him carefully, she noticed the slightest turn of his head at her approach. He knew she was there, but he didn't acknowledge her or speak. After several more paces she reached him, standing beside him in the night.

His body was pulled tight as a bow; his shoulders raised and pinched, and she could see his temples pulsing as he worked his jaw; she could practically hear his teeth grinding together. His hands were clenched in fists and his stance was rigid. He was right beside her, but his thoughts were light years away.

She stood next to him quietly for a moment, feeling the anger and despair roil off of him as though it were a physical thing.

Her heart clenched at the wavering sigh that escaped him. Taking his hand in hers seemed to jolt him back to the present. "Come with me," she spoke softly so as not to startle him.

"Kathryn," he spoke through clenched teeth. Her blue eyes shone in the moonlight as they fought silently to get his attention. Finally, his eyes landed on hers.

They stared at one another in silence, and though it was dark, she could read his thoughts as though he'd spoken them aloud.

_I'm sorry we are stuck here._

_I am sorry I decided to go after Seska._

_I'm sorry you put your trust in me and I failed you. _

_I'm sorry for everything._

Her emotions at his total despair clenched her throat, making it difficult to breath. How could he put this blame on himself? This was not his fault. It was no one's fault but Seska, Culluh and the rest of the Kazon that followed him. They had preyed on Chakotay's strong and giving heart, and her own willingness to do anything for her crew.

She tried to convey as much with her gaze, but he wouldn't have it. She blinked quickly to stop the tears that threatened to build; she was determined to make him understand that this was not his burden to bear.

"Chakotay, come and sit with me for a minute." She saw his eyes flash to hers, knowing that he knew what she was getting at, remembering those weeks ago when he'd practically dragged her into a turbo lift to escape herself for one minute. He wasn't sure though if he wanted the relief of his burden. He certainly knew he didn't deserve it. "Chakotay, just come and sit with me for one minute, please? Let me carry your burdens for a change, even if only for a few moments." His heart clenched at her words. "It's just one minute," she spoke quietly, in a tone that told him that she needed this just as much as he did. It was that knowledge that finally made him acquiesce.

Letting out a sigh of pure defeat, he nodded.

Allowing her to lead him wherever she desired, he followed behind her, the pull of her hand in his like his own north star, leading him to safety.

She found a large boulder several meters from camp and moved behind it. They were hidden from their crew, but the space was still touched by the pale moonlight. She let go of his hand and sat down, pressing her back against the granite behind her. Several seconds after Chakotay had made no move to follow suit, she patted the spot beside her gently.

Without a word he sat down next to her, still rigid, but at least he was there.

They both sat with their legs stretched out before them, though they did not touch. Kathryn crossed her ankles and let her hands rest at her sides.

Chakotay sat like a stone himself beside her, and she frowned. This wasn't working. Not sure what to do or say, she remained silent, hoping against hope that just sitting beside her would lighten his dark mood.

After just a few seconds Chakotay broke the silence. "I'm sorry about your hair, Kathryn." He spoke into the darkness, his words coming out on a regretful sigh. His brown eyes traveled to where he knew her hair had been cut away, then over to rest on her face, his gaze searching for absolution.

Kathryn smiled gently in the moonlight. "It's nothing. I would cut it all off if it would keep you warm." She spoke softly, and Chakotay noted that she had said 'to keep you warm' and not 'to keep the crew warm' but he was too exhausted to ask her to clarify; not sure he was in the right frame of mind to hear whatever her answer might be.

He reached up and gently took hold of the shortened strands, letting the silky tresses slip softly between his fingers. He did this several times before dropping his hand to rest beside hers in the dirt.

In the span of only a few heart beats, Kathryn slid her hand around his wrist, turning his palm up to lace her fingers between his, clasping his hand tenderly.

She heard his intake of breath, waited as he held it for a moment before letting it out. His shoulders sagged as he exhaled, the tension finally being released as the air left his lungs.

He leaned back into the boulder behind them, gradually allowing himself to relax. Kathryn smiled in the darkness, glad for him slowly accepting the situation at hand. Closing her eyes to the world around them, she tipped her head slightly to rest it against his shoulder, letting out a contented sigh of her own. She hadn't realized until then just how much she needed this moment as well.

Chakotay felt the weight of Kathryn's head on his shoulder and had to choke back his emotions as they threatened to consume him. They were stuck on this planet, maybe for the rest of their lives. Visions of New Earth flashed in his mind's eye and he cursed the spirits for uprooting them from such paradise only to drop them in this veritable hell.

He had stranded his crew here and probably sentenced them all to a slow and painful death. If starvation didn't kill them, whatever violent creatures lived here probably would. They had meager fires and barely enough firewood to keep them all going, and barely enough food to feed twenty people, let alone one hundred and fifty. And one crew member was already dead because of his decision to go after Seska.

And Kathryn had lost Voyager.

Chakotay deserved this fate; of that he was certain. He deserved to starve to death, or be eaten by whatever monstrous creature had consumed Hogan and left nothing but his slime covered and tattered uniform.

But the crew did not deserve this...Kathryn did not deserve this.

Kathryn...

The warmth of her beside him as she leaned against him, her head resting on his shoulder gave him pause. After all of this, after everything he had put her through, she was still there for him...still giving him exactly what he needed.

The peaceful feeling that she always created in him settled slowly in his heart for the first time since the Kazon had forced them off of the bridge that morning.

He leaned towards her, resting his cheek on the top of her head. Tipping his face slightly he buried his nose in her hair, taking in a slow, deep breath. The aroma of her flooded his being and he closed his eyes to the tears that burned there at the onslaught of her scent; her lavender shampoo, remnants of her sweat, and wood smoke. Without a word he pressed the lightest of kisses to her crown before turning his head back to face the darkness before them, his cheek still resting against her hair.

Chakotay felt nothing in the universe but the warmth of Kathryn beside him, his hand clasped tightly in hers and the softness of her hair beneath his cheek. He closed his eyes, praying to the spirits that he could find a way to fix this. He didn't know what he would or could do, but he would make this right. As if sensing his conviction, Kathryn reached across her body, wrapping her fingers around his bicep, giving it a gentle squeeze.

Chakotay felt a single tear escape and fall at the intimacy of the moment. In the span of a few dozen seconds Kathryn had changed his entire perspective. He took a silent breath, filling his lungs with air and his heart with hope. He would do anything to keep Kathryn beside him. As he exhaled, he felt the negative energy that he'd been carrying in his soul begin to dissipate. He would survive this...they would survive this.

He would make sure Kathryn survived this.

Kathryn felt the change in his demeanor; the very air around them began to feel lighter as he excised whatever demons had been possessing him. Turning in the darkness, she pressed her lips to his shoulder and placed a kiss there. She felt him sigh again, the softest contented sound coming out with his breath.

Letting out a sigh of her own, relief filling the void where her concern for him had lived, she gave his arm one more light squeeze before standing up. Brushing the dirt from her pants she turned towards him, noticing in the light of the moon that his eyes were shut. He still looked sad, but the despair was gone, and for that she was grateful. "Take whatever time you need," she whispered, touching his shoulder gently before moving away from him.

He listened to her footfalls as she walked back towards camp, certain without knowing how, that everything would be alright.

Because they would face this together.


End file.
